weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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