Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
She needs sedatives and a leash
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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