i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
