Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
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You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
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My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
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