My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock