guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
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