WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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