Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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