some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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