It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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