You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
This baby is an asshole
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize