How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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