i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Dignity is for republicans.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
