How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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