why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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