ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
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