I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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