what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
