Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
