took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
