I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
