It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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