Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Randomize
