Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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