trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
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