and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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