if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Randomize
