my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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