think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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