so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
You dont lie about slip and slides
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
