so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
