No awkward lesbian experiences without me
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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