im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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