Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
