Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
home. puking in laundry basket.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
