found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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