I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
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