Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
