your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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