it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
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