A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
just tell him i said nine months
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
