i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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