the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Randomize
