I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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