i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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