You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
You're like the curious george of whores
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
