Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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