You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
