It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Randomize
