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Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize