go do what you do best...puke behind churches
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
