he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Randomize
